Posts Tagged ‘sexual abuse’

Penn State and how the NCAA made the right decision

July 23, 2012

I grew up in Big Ten country (long before PSU became a member!): there were coaches that even the most die-hard Buckeye fans had to offer up (begrudging) respect.  Joe Paterno was one of them.  He ran a clean program.  He stood for what college athletics is about: winning with class.  Yes, he should have retired about 15 years ago but he was JoePa as iconic to Happy Valley as John Wooden was to UCLA.  This past year we just didn’t learn there wasn’t Santa: we learned that Santa stole from our best friend to give to our most despised enemy.  I know, in part, that is why it hurts.  We didn’t want to believe that one of the greater than life legends of college athletics knowingly covered up the sexual abuse of children.  We wanted to believe one of his last interviews with Sally Jenkins that he didn’t know what was going on.  The emails, the notes when they became public weren’t so much stunning revelations as much as confirmations of what we didn’t want to believe.

As the NCAA fast tracked the investigation process, rumors swirled about the death penalty.  A part of me wanted PSU to receive a total death penalty (with scholarships honored) for all sports, Paterno set the culture at PSU.  PSU has a history of discrimination in athletics (case and point, Renee Portland).  A larger part of me realized that the death penalty for PSU football beyond punishing the players who were not on campus at the time of the coverup, punished the wider community.  The local economy depends on football season: State College is a town of roughly 42,000 people: the football stadium houses 106,000 people.  The tax revenue alone probably funds a majority of the local government budget.  The restaurants, bars, stores, the minimum wage workers all suffer the most with a death penalty.

Is 60 million dollars enough: I’m not sure.  The football revenue in 2010 was 52 million dollars.  Football, in part, funds non-revenue sports (and scholarships).  Is it a good move that the money will be placed into a trust not to be used by the university but administered to assist and raise awareness of the childhood sexual abuse.  The NCAA is allowing all current players (including freshman) to transfer without penalty.  The huge scholarship limits over the next four years will force PSU into massive rebuilding.  The additional sanctions by the Big 10 in not allowing revenue sharing from bowl games will be an additional reminder.

The NCAA penalty “lack of institutional control” has been seen as laughable.  Before, it would mean an extra year of probation or maybe an additional scholarship.  The NCAA spoke loud and clear today: even though an NCAA violation did not occur (really), the NCAA acted in a manner which will serve as a reminder for years to come.  While those in Happy Valley will mourn what was: maybe they will (eventually) see that just like Santa, Paterno’s legend was mythical.  He was a flawed man who made a horrible mistakes.  As the leader of the organization, even in his death, his corporation must be punished.  They will suit up in Happy Valley this fall.  They will play for the love of the sport.  And at the end of the day, maybe, just maybe more individuals will have the courage to come forward and speak up about corporate corruption, harm to children and issues which need to be voiced.

If any good is to come out of this tragedy, may it be that if you and three of your friends go out for drinks, one of you was probably abused as a child.  It’s time we start to have that conversation and build resources to help survivors heal.  There will always be pedophiles.  When the shame of being a victim is one begins to lessen through education, awareness and action that we can learn from because of Penn State, only then can we say we learned a lesson from Sandusky and Paterno.

Penn State Missed an Opportunity

November 10, 2011

I can’t find the transcript of what Penn State representatives chose to say to the media last night. Quite honestly, I’m not interested in reading it.  I’m going to let the college students rioting thing be what it is: hopefully in a few years they will understand why it as a dumb move.  I made the mistake of reading the grand jury findings.  I’m not sure what I was looking for when I read the document.

I found myself becoming angry.  Angry at the conversations about the way “Paterno had to leave”.  Joe Paterno sealed his fate: he stated he “regretted” his decision when the graduate student came forward: he had years to speak up, this didn’t happen in June.

Paterno said in a statement he was “absolutely devastated” by the case, in which his former assistant and onetime heir apparent, Jerry Sandusky, has been charged with molesting eight boys in 15 years, with some of the alleged abuse taking place at the Penn State football complex.

“This is a tragedy,” Paterno said. “It is one of the great sorrows of my life. With the benefit of hindsight, I wish I had done more.”  So do we all, Joe. So do we all.  Coming forward the day of your firing to try to have one more home game shows, to me, that you can’t do the honorable thing.  You should have walked away.  Penn State, instead of firing you and others involved should have said “We are Penn State University: we do not tolerate this behavior at any level by anybody associated with our school.”  Penn State isn’t alone in this, but any school that doesn’t say when dismissing an individual for ethical violations to crimes against others we do not tolerate this here is just as complacent as those who stood by and did nothing.

Joe Paterno has 17 grandchildren.  Statistically speaking one of them will be the victim of sexual abuse before his/her 16th birthday (actually, probably 2).  How can he look at them and know that he condoned through in action the type of behavior which destroys a life.

It does destroy a life.  The life can be rebuilt but there is always something missing.  Rick Reilly has a sublime article on ESPN: read it.  There is always something missing when you have been the victim of sexual abuse as a child.  You intrinsically learn distrust (and some where Erik Erikson is smiling as it’s one of his flipping 8 stages of human development).  You learn silence. You learn self-doubt.  You are told people won’t believe you.  I can go on but I won’t out of self-preservation.

There are 8 young men who had their lives ruined by an iconic institution.  They came forward and spoke out through the legal system.  They will rebuild their lives.  Slowly.  We all do and at some level the pain never goes away.  I hope they have people around them who will support them and hold them through the difficult days.  They are the heroes.  They said what many adults can only say in a whisper and many years later.

But Penn State? What should they have done. Cancelled the remainder of the football season, cancelled it until they were sure that every member of the Penn State faculty and staff who were involved in the cover-up of the rape of children were no longer welcome in Happy Valley.

Instead? The game goes on – with the witness coaching.

And Paterno? I hope he can find a way to look in the mirror and answer “were those wins worth the lives I destroyed” honestly.  Only then would I think about letting him out of the seat next to Sandusky in hell.


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